Navigating Conflict Resolution in the Workplace

No matter how you slice it, hard conversations are… well? Just hard. No one wants to have them, but true leaders are willing to face this challenge head on because it’s absolutely necessary.

The truth is, conflict resolution can make or break any relationship. Conflict can come out of nowhere, even among those you admire and respect the most. We aren’t always going to see eye-to-eye with everyone and that’s okay. As leaders, we need to shift our perspective on conflict in the workplace and see that it’s a normal part of leadership development and relationship building in the workplace.

Conflict resolution should be part of a healthy, thriving company culture and is an essential building block for stronger teams and leadership growth.

Unfortunately, there are too many leaders who aren’t great at conflict resolution. I can recall far too many times where I’ve been sitting in a room with a superior who was dancing around a subject because they were too uncomfortable to say the hard thing.

All I could think was, “please land the plane… just say it already.” 

I even had a colleague once that came out of a meeting with her boss scratching her head. When I asked her how it went, she said, “I think I’m moving teams, but I’m not exactly sure.” 

If you find yourself in a similar situation with a leader struggling to clearly communicate, I encourage you to push back. Don’t be afraid to ask questions and let them know that you don’t understand. Repeat back to them what they’ve said and ask questions like, “is this what you mean when you say….”, or “I’m having a hard time understanding what you mean when you say….”

If you’re a leader, learning how to elevate the way you communicate will catapult your growth trajectory and open many doors of opportunity.

If you can learn the art of conflict resolution and embrace hard conversations appropriately, you will position yourself far above your peers… and maybe even some of your leaders. 

When you’re willing to have hard conversations and address issues head on, the rising leaders you influence will respect you even more. Yes, it may be hard to hear, but if you’ve laid the groundwork for trust and accountability, they will ultimately see your ability to address conflict head on as a valuable asset to their own growth.

If you struggle with conflict resolution or simply want to get better at it, here are 3 ways to address conflict head-on as you develop trust, honesty, and growth among your team.

Process the Conflict

All too often leaders feel the need to react to conflict before thinking it through. The problem with this approach, however, is that reacting in the moment leaves much room for error and we tend to lean on our emotional or gut responses. I don’t need to get into why this is a bad idea…

If you’re met with a conflict and feel the immediate need to respond, assess the situation and consider giving yourself time to process the issue so you can think through the best approach. This gives you leverage because now you can be thoughtful and considerate of all those involved.

Address the Conflict 

After you’ve taken the time to process the conflict, don't forget to do the hard work of addressing it. This involves getting the right people in the room together and communicating clearly.

Don’t blindside the person you’re speaking to. Make sure to notify them, set aside appropriate time where no party will be distracted, and be thoughtful about the words you want to say. This is not the time to “wing it” even if you are good on your feet. Put a plan together, write it down, make an outline… whatever you do, be prepared and make sure you speak clearly and directly.

The biggest mistake I see made is when leaders try to “sugarcoat” the issue by saying way too many words before getting to the point.

That doesn’t mean you can’t begin and end on a positive note, just make sure that every word you’re saying has value and supports your main point.

Establish Boundaries

After addressing the conflict, make sure to establish clear boundaries. If someone is out of line, don’t just address what they did that was wrong but offer an example of best practices moving forward.

If you’re offering critical feedback on someone’s performance, offer clear and specific examples of how they can incorporate your feedback and continue to develop themselves.

If you’re terminating a position, which is one of the hardest conversations to have, make sure you’re clear on the why, and consider (if appropriate) offering tangible feedback that they can take with them on their next venture.

Conflict resolution doesn’t have to be scary. Consider every conflict as an opportunity to develop your leadership skills. There are many leaders who avoid conflict. If you can learn how to resolve it, you - and your team - will benefit greatly.