Who is Jesus? Maryann’s Story

Jesus is my beacon of light

This past month of sheltering in place has increased my mental health symptoms to their absolute breaking point. I’ve cried, screamed, hid under blankets on my bed, and fallen deep into the depths of sadness. I have been in mourning.

Mourning my normal routine, my family’s routine, and all that I dubbed as important aspects of my life. I am so thankful for the amount of therapy, group therapy, numerous other exercises, and tools I have worked through in my past. It has helped me cope and manage my emotions, thoughts, and feelings around our current state of affairs. 

While all of the psychotherapeutic tools have been instrumental in bringing me back to the present, along with radically accepting this new season of normal and created space for healthy thoughts and feelings, another major component to my sanity is my relationship with Christ. 

Being a Christ follower during this time of uncertainty, fake medical babble, and ever changing health safety protocols, my Savior has never wavered or changed. His is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. 

Turbulent times always bring humanity back to searching for spirituality. Something bigger than themself – a higher power. I am thankful that I have had a relationship with Christ for half my life. I am absolutely blessed by the decision I made 20 years ago. It is a decision, especially in this season, that I am thankful for. I have been in my Bible more than ever. I search the pages of my Bible for verses that I know will calm my anxious mind. I have listened to past sermons and read more devotionals than I have as a Christ follower. 

For the past two thousand years, His Word has never changed and I love that it hasn’t. Knowing that His word has stayed the same through all types of tragedy, triumphs, and tribulation reminds me that no matter what, He will never leave me – especially right now.

So I have leaned into Him because right now I need that consistency. I have set myself up to be immersed in His truth by beginning my mornings by spending time with Him, reaching out to other Christ followers when I am struggling emotionally and mentally, and created a safe space to allow others to seek support for me if necessary.

I ensure I fill myself with His word daily even before I selectively immerse myself in news and social media. This has allowed me to stay grounded in His truth and when I slip into deep sadness and darkness, His Word brings me back to His light. Because let’s be real, there are many times when the uncertainty all around us is overwhelming. If you’re anything like me, looking within yourself for strength sometimes isn’t possible. 

Sister, start today by knowing that He has all the strength you need to sustain you. Focus on what can be done today with His help. This simple act has allowed me to be more gracious with myself and those around me and will also allow you to see Jesus as your beacon of light.

about the author…

Maryann, otherwise known as the Filipino Mom, is an entrepreneur, life coach, and mental health advocate who shares her struggles to help, heal, and encourage others.

She shares honestly about her own mental health journey, what it’s like being a wife and mom of 5, and is truly passionate about helping others – especially those in the Filipino community – through mental health awareness.

You can connect with more of her on her blog and follow her authentic journey on Instagram and Facebook.

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